3 IN A ROW AT ROE

As dawn broke on the first day after one of the most extraordinary weeks in cricket, the cricketing world arose to discover the shocking news that Andy Symonds, Australia's hero of the last World-Cup had been suspended for two games for turning up to play Bangladesh having been on the turps all night and still smelling of it when the Punter went out for the toss. Whilst there are various reasons why none of the Weekenders will ever be available for selection in the Australian team, with such a draconian policy, none of us would want to. Word has it though that as the bleary-eyed bludgeoner watched shamefully from the dressing room as Australia copped it from England, a slight glimmer of a smile was seen when the news was conveyed to him that somewhere else in England the Weekenders had amassed an extraordinary 8 in the Green Man in Putney a full hour before play and raised a glass in his honour for keeping the spirit of cricket alive.

By 2.00 pm 12 Weekenders stood raring to go on the edge of the Roehampton pitch having put on a display of nudity in the glorious sunshine that would have made the curator of Hampstead Heath blush…well 11 (Hoggers choosing to change with the Oppo in the shed). However Mark, the skipper of Roehampton, meekly admitted that despite their efforts to recruit any scantily clad vixen lying about the field, they were but 6. But as is so often the case, the Skipper justified his hefty appearance fee and ably assisted by the senior pros who took the opportunity to abandon the Skip and scout the boundary for all manner of bumps, crevasses, potholes and other distractions, carefully negotiated a compromise agreeing a 35 over 9-aside game and pimping Piers, Rob and Ben to the Oppo, who with great magnanimity agreed to stand in and make a day of it.

In what is now becoming a habit, the Weekenders batted first and Hoggers and Disco in his first appearance of the season got the game off to a sprightly start. Unfortunately Disco found himself in the action once too often and was back under the trees sipping a pint before the second over was done. Next in was Jules whose battles with a certain monkey had reached a stalemate last season but just of late the tide had seemed to turn. After a stylish 31, said monkey was well and truly removed from the back and had been mercilessly spanked and rather unceremoniously dispatched to the undergrowth, presumably for further spanking and what ever else goes on there. All the while, Hoggers stoically held up his end and with a succession of Weekenders together with an ever mounting total of extras (including a marvellous 14 ball over from McLeod) kept the total ticking over. Indeed the usually mild mannered accountant/banker/finance something(?) felt the extras should have been higher chastising a number of umpires for their failure to penalise the wrongs of the bowling. But the talk of the innings was the very tidy spell of left arm pace from Rob which caused all sorts of trouble before a late flurry from Douggo and the Skipper help lift the score to 226 from 31 overs.

The chase faltered early with Douggo and Franks moving the ball about with ease. And Franks was equally as devastating in the field choosing to make up for his earlier batting display with an incredible direct hit from the outfield, sadly missed by his adoring fan. The Skip skilfully rotated the bowling, and with the introduction of Disco and Flat laid a cunning field, wisely placing the leaping Hogben at deep square leg on the shortened boundary side. Whilst the ball never really came close to him all about agreed that it was a stunningly athletic display and with the relentless pressure of the bowlers, it was only a matter of time before Roehampton eventually capitulated. All out for 124, Weekenders win by 102.

WCC: 226 (all out) 31 overs
Hogben 78, Hargroves 15, Lyons 31, Johnstone 33, Hajela 4, Franks 0 (showing off to Mariana), Douglas 14, d'Inverno 6, Simmonds 0*
Playing for the Oppo: Rowe 2/0/20/0, Wallace 3/0/28/2, Hunter 11/0/45/3

Roehampton: 124 (all out) 19.5 overs
Hunt 58
Douglas 5/1/15/2, Franks 5/0/21/1, Simmonds 5/0/39/2, Hajela 3/0/25/0, Hargroves 1.5/0/23/2
Playing for the Oppo: Rowe 0, Wallace 9, Hunter 0.

Catches: Johnstone (wk) 4, Lyons 1 Runout: Franks (direct hit)