Sargent Men

Graham Hogben

 

Our reporter at last Sunday's game was one of many people overcome by sunstroke, so there is sadly no match report. However, a few scraps of news have filtered through:

-Player numbers crisis due to late drop outs (explained and unexplained) leaves skipper with fewer players than functioning digits

-Sargent Men make steady start as the Harvey brothers gain further experience of the Poms' inability to catch

Confusion in fielding ranks as opposition opener announces he's "going large"; skipper unable to reach Hargroves or Whitehead for clarification

Franks makes late entry to fray in open toe sandals, announcing his boots were stolen on way to game. Skipper generously agrees to swap and model said sandals, before casting aside to set new speed record for boundary chase in socks

 

 stumper Smee stumps

 guest 15-year old delivers widest wide ever seen, estimated as leg-stump full toss on fifth cut strip to the right

St Andrews duo in harmony as Sackville claims scalp courtesy of Maloney catch (see below...)

the boys flag as skipper forced to test just how inventive you can be with a 3-3 field on the biggest ground in London

Mike Harvey yorker prompts early declaration

Weekenders' openers flay attack in 3-over pre-tea session, as Maloney flaunts his newly acquired Sehwag impression

Weekenders' openers fail to flay attack in post-tea session

Pytches rues the extra large edges on new bat as he falls 116 short of previous outing

St Andrews duo in discord as Sackville's run a ball innings curtailed by controversial run out

Smee and the Harvey demonstrate art of hitting 2s, 3s and 4s in middle order cameos, as Richard "singles" Maloney adds 16 in 16 scoring shots  

Maloney and skipper decline opportunity to chase 50 off 2 overs as draw is salvaged

Other items this week:

-              Julian "99" Lyons battles under the weight of expectation of going one better next time

-              -  skipper and Hon Sec ponder optimum fielding position for full size Captain Birds Eye cardboard cutout

-              -  2-year old Smee junior signed up as strike bowler for 2018 season

-              -  Major excitement in Old Pros Corner as it is revealed that in 1988 the team amassed 2659 runs (including 111 byes) over a season in which Mike Freeman's average innings lasted 36 mins and Richard Black bowled 32 wides

-              -  relative merits of Sharjah and Perth under consideration for the inaugural Weekenders v CACC Anglo-Aussie challenge match

-               first recorded instance of stats rage as match report fails to reach Hereford on schedule

-              -  Richard "fancy spreadsheet" Maloney takes the helm as Match Manager for August –

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-              PLEASE CONTACT HIM on 07711 297848 with all requests for a game


Appendix A

-              (Hereford readers only)

Sargent Men 183-3 dec (30.5 overs) Simcock 55*, Seed 50, Walters 36, M.Harvey 2-32
WCC 137-7 (41 overs) Maloney 66*, d'Inverno 0*, Donovan 4-42
Match Drawn

Season to date : Played 13, Won 4, Drawn 6, Lost 3